Monthly Archives: March 2013

I gave birth to Pint-Sized Negotiators

Posted in Life Lessons, Time Management, Work Mom Balance by

Recently, Hubby and I decided to give the kids a little bit more responsibility when it came to household matters and chores.   We invoked several mandates such as:

Clean your room or whatever is left that is not put away gets tossed in the big black garbage bag, never to be replaced.Setting the Table

Showering is not us nagging.  It’s personal hygiene.  Get in the shower at least every other day – two days max.

You have your own beds.  Sleep in them or we will turn your room into our hobby rooms.

For the most part, things have been running quite smoothly.  In fact, our youngest has even taken the initiative to do dishes whenever possible.  Granted this process takes twice as long and requires my complete attention, I have been pleased with the results.  But most recently, I have been finding that with each suggestion or given task comes with a much higher price.

$25 please, and I will clean my room in less than 10 minutes…

Look how nice I was to my sister.  That’s worth at least $5…

One Skylander Giant if I set the table…

Girl cleaning the house with a broomI am not sure what gave my children the notion that we “pay” for their services.  Clearly, they do not “pay” us to keep a dry roof over their heads or to drive them from school to practice to play dates.  However, they have become fixated on being compensated for their services – and their rates are outrageous.  Seriously, $25 to clean a room!?!?!  How about I give you $5 and you take five hours to clean it.

After much thought and reflection, I decided that while their pay scale was completely unattainable, their negotiation tactics are to be admired.  I never – at their age – had the insight to be paid for being nice to my brother (although I am sure he would have appreciated it) nor did I negotiate terms for cleaning my room.  So how come my children do?

I think the answer is simple.  It’s my fault.  Way, way, way back when I first began blogging, I explained how I would give an allowance for the chores they completed.  And today, almost two years later, inflation has taken over the pay scale.  So I decided to take matters into my own hands.  I adjusted their rates for their contributions to household chores, but indicated half of what was received needs to be placed in the vacation jar.  The more they do, the more they earn for the ice cream and mini golf and summer time beach fun.

For now, this adjustment seems to be working.  For now, anyways……

March Madness Indeed

Posted in Finally Friday, Time Management, Work Mom Balance by

March Madness has evolved beyond the fact that #12 always beats #5 sometimes.

photo(16)Let’s begin with the weather.  Weather forecasters can’t contain their excitement with the possibility that snow is the forecast almost every other day.  It may not actually snow, but the threat is there.  And on days when snow is absent in the forecast, forecasters love to share how warm it was this time last year.  Madness.

Speaking of “where the hell is Spring”,  Poor Puxatauney Phil is being sued in Ohio.   Don’t the courts have better things to do than sue a groundhog and don’t get me started on spending tax payer’s money.  Seriously, in this day and age, I thought everyone realized “Groundhog Day” was ceremonial and not science. (It also gave us one of the best Bill Murray films, but I digress.) Madness.

And since we are on the topic of stupidity, let me take a moment to talk rudeness.  When will people realize the manner in which you respond to another human being via email is a representation of who you are in real life.  If you are having a bad day, it’s best to NOT respond to anyone whether by phone or email.  Just call it a day and hope tomorrow is better. Madness.

There are nine days left in March 2013.  There is another snow storm “in the works” for this coming Sunday and Harvard (rank #14) beat New Mexico (rank #3).  Yes, folks.  It’s March Madness.

*disclaimer* Have it be known, I know absolutely nothing about college basketball.  I know my bracket invite is meant to make the pool more fruitful financially.  However, in my years playing this silly game, I have come to learn #12 always beats #5 sometimes, Gonzaga seems to do well (and I think it’s a super cool college name) and every year I say I don’t care if I win this pool but will check the rankings at least once per hour in rounds 1 – 3.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Facebook Changed Me

Posted in Parent Dilemma, Time Management, Work Mom Balance by

facebook_logoHello.  My name is CC Fowler and I have been a Facebook user since 2006.

I joined shortly after my second child was born and truth be told, I joined to see what old friends I lost touch with were up to.  Once I had found everyone I thought I wanted to find, my usage and purpose for Facebook evolved.  With my curiosity satiated, I began to delete “friends” who clearly were connected to me for the same reasons I was connected to them – to be nosy.  There was no loved lost and it seemed I was not alone in this action.  I was deleted by many a-friends too and quite honestly, it felt good.

But with as many “friends” as I deleted, I gained many more.

My relationship with Facebook again morphed into a phase which clearly mirrored my life at that time.  Deciding the housing market was officially kaput, Hubby and I decided to set our roots and become part of our local community.  And with this move came a new slew of friends – local friends, parents of my children’s friends and neighbors too.  It was the perfect tool to stay connected and keep track of what was cooking locally.  It is still to this day, one my favorite parts of Facebook.

But nothing ever stays the same and yet another phase began to take over.

In 2011, Facebook prompted my alias life of CC Fowler – the blogger.  Why write a status about motherhood or being a mother who freely chose to return to work when I could write a post?   Why not share my experiences with those who were about to embark, were already sharing the ride or just deciding to take this crazy roller coaster of motherhood journey. With that, Centraljerseyworkingmoms was born.  Through this phase of Facebook, I have met and made more “friends” – many of whom I respect and treasure.  In fact, we became friends after we met on Facebook!   Who would have ever thought!  Certainly not me.

Seven years later – 7 years ( I can hardly believe it’s been seven years) – Facebook is a part of my every day life.  I use it to catch up with friends.  I use it for work.  I use it like I use my coffee machine – every day and often.  I can remember approaching the Executive Director of my company suggesting we create a company Facebook page.  It was a rejected idea that eventually was accepted.  Today, I administer six company pages.

Nothing places a smile on my face faster than and old friend sharing a birthday of their parent or the announcement of the birth of a child.  News I would not be privy to if I was not on Facebook.  Sure, there are times (many in fact) where reading a “friend’s” post will send me into a tizzy, but over the years I have come to learn these posts are “friends” trying to communicate who they are (or want us to believe they are) and they have just as much right to enjoy their dose of Facebook as much as I (see the joys of “unfriending” earlier in this post).

Only time will tell how Facebook will impact me – my view of society – others perceptions of me – and my perceptions of others.  But until then, I am CC Fowler and I’m a Facebook user.

Now how about a vague post to draw out a response?

Being “Good” is all the Gift I Need

Posted in Time Management, Life Lessons, Work Mom Balance, Parent Dilemma by

Today, marks the last day of the 7th Anniversary of my 29th Birthday.  Tomorrow, I embark on the 8th Anniversary of my 29th Birthday.

Alright, so I am going to be a 37-year-old person tomorrow.  Big deal.  It’s just a number and according to my son, I still look like a 45-years old so what more could a girl want.

Well, what I really, really, really want this year and every year to come is a gift that monetarily costs nothing and would validate every ounce of who I am.  It was asked of me when I was child and I like to think  I delivered.

Let me explain.

Growing up, I asked my mother what she would like for her birthday.  And each year she would say the same – be good.   I hated this request and would resent my mother for not asking for something like perfume or flowers or jewelry.  It wasn’t until I was much older, with a paying after-school job, that I was able to buy her little things.   I’d like to think in the end, I gave her the gift of “being good” – except for maybe a year or two through my adolescent and college years.

Fast forward to now:  My very own children now ask the same of me.  “Mommy, what would like for your birthday?”

Without a second thought, I simply stated, “Being Good is all the gift I need.”

Shit. No sooner had the words left my lips did I cringe in horror.   Is turning age 37 the year we turn into our mothers?

Well, luckily, my son indicated it’s just not possible to “be good“.

“What if I tell Daddy to buy you a new car?  I don’t want to touch my piggy bank”,  he said.

The truth is, there is really nothing I want other than to know that I am doing a good job raising my children.  I would like to think I am raising decent, caring human beings who will one day be adults who contribute to society in a positive way.

So I changed my approach and asked,  “What about trying to be the best you can be AND some seeds to plant in our garden this coming Spring.”

Little Man seemed to like this idea. He said he would get Daddy to buy seeds and promised to be the best he could be……”but please remind me because I will forget.”

So on the cusp of turning another year older, I look forward to what life will bring and hope that I can be a good enough Mother to have good kids.

…Oh and as for what my Mother is currently asking for – Gift certificates to restaurants, clothing stores, spas and Broadway Plays.    Apparently, she is making up for lost time.

…Oh and to my husband who may be reading this – this post doesn’t really apply to you.  I really really really really want to go to London.

 

Take Notes

Posted in Health, Time Management, Work Mom Balance by

482515_10200376054620437_299231215_nIs it too late to make a New Year’s Resolution?  Nah….right?

With just weeks away from Spring and warmer, get-outside weather approaching, I think now – more than ever – is a great time to make resolutions.

So join me in starting fresh and new.  List three items you want to either add, change or do between now and the end of the year.

 

1. Run a 5K – “run” being the operative word.  In fact, let me rephrase that.  I am going to complete a 5K.  With the help of my fellow kettle bell ladies, I am training for a fun afternoon of mud, foam and laughter.

2. Scale it Back.  Most times less is more and these days time is too precious to waste.  This applies to people, work and home.

3. Take Notes.  For the most part, we are who we are.  However, there is always room for improvement.  I find I learn the most when I am willing be nowhere near where I think I should be.  So I will take notes – good notes, long notes and silly notes too.

Now it’s your turn.  List three things you would like to add, change or do in your life.  Make it easy.  Make it fun.  Make it something that will make your life closer to what you want it to be.  Take Notes.